The Non-Fat Yogurt

“The Non-Fat Yogurt” is the sixth episode of Season Five, and the 71st overall. It originally aired November 4, 1993. The episode was directed by Tom Cherones and Larry David. The episode is notable for the amount of swearing (although censored), and the cameo at the end by the newly elected NYC mayor, Rudy Giuliani.

Plot

Jerry, Elaine and George eat at a non-fat frozen yogurt shop in which Kramer has invested. The yogurt is delicious, and they (along with Newman) indulge, as it is "non-fat." When Kramer notices that Jerry and Elaine have gained weight, they become suspicious of the yogurt's contents. Elaine decides to send the yogurt to a laboratory for testing. Meanwhile, Jerry accidentally says "fuck" (which is censored) within earshot of the shop owner's son Matthew, who then starts to use the word frequently. When he tries to apologize, Matthew intentionally ruins a cassette tape of one of his stand-up routines, causing Jerry to say "fuck" yet again. Elaine's new beau and George's nemesis, Lloyd Braun (Peter Keleghan), works as an aide to the mayor of New York City, David Dinkins, currently up for re-election against Rudy Giuliani. Elaine suggests that everyone in the city wear name tags, so that they can greet each other. Lloyd takes the idea to Dinkins, much to everyone else's ridicule. Braun eventually breaks up with Elaine; she claims that it is the fault of her weight gain from eating the yogurt. Kramer, fearful of losing his investment, tries to sway a lab technician to falsify the analysis of the yogurt. In the process, they kiss passionately, and a sample of blood with high cholesterol falls into a test tube belonging to Rudy Giuliani. In the end, though, the lab reveals that the yogurt does, indeed, contain fat. Business plummets, especially when Giuliani receives the results of a physical claiming that he has high cholesterol. Giuliani reveals that he, too, has eaten a great deal of frozen yogurt lately, and vows to eliminate false advertising in the city. The yogurt shop now serves real non-fat yogurt which is not as good, leaving Newman furious and blaming Jerry; as a result, Newman plans to get back at Jerry. The episode ends with the main characters watching Giuliani deliver his victory speech over Dinkins; the "name tag fiasco" cost him the election. Matthew then walks up to Jerry and chastises him: “Thanks for ruining my daddy’s business, you fat fuck.” Needless to say, “fuck” was censored again.

Notes about Nothing

• If Dinkins would have won the election, Phil Morris (Jackie Chiles starting in Season Seven) would appear as a Dinkins advisor in the final scene, instead of Giuliani's cameo. Lloyd Braun would also work for Giuliani, and it would be Dinkin's blood that would be tampered with.
  • An alternate version of this episode with said changes can be found on the DVD.
  • Also on the DVD, an alternate scene with Lloyd Braun busting George for faking his arm injury can be found. In the same scene, Lloyd shows his sarcastic side when Elaine mentions the name tags being a good idea.