"The Nose Job"
Season 3
Episode 26
Air Date November 20, 1991
Writer(s) Peter Mehlman
Director Tom Cherones
The Tape · The Stranded

“The Nose Job” is the ninth episode of Season Three of Seinfeld and the twenty-sixth episode overall. It aired on November 20, 1991.


George Costanza dates a woman named Audrey, who is very attractive except for a huge nose. She talks to the crew about how insecure she feels in New York with so many beautiful women. Cosmo Kramer attempts to "reassure" her by telling her she is beautiful, but all she needs is a nose job. Meanwhile, Jerry Seinfeld dates a beautiful model who has great sex with him, but to whom he is bored talking.

Notes About Nothing

  • The first episode where Kramer uses the alias Dr. Von Nostrand. The alter-ego also appears in "The Package" (season 8) and "The Slicer" (season 9).
  • Jerry's line "My nose my nose, my kingdom for a nose" is a play on the famous quote "A horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse" from Shakespeare's play Richard III. The joke is on George for giving up his relationship with Audrey all over her large nose and failed nose job (which is later corrected by Kramer's doctor).
  • George dates a woman named Audrey, whose dominating physical feature is her large nose.
  • George states in this episode that he is from Long island; however, in later episodes he is said to have grown up in his parents' home in Queens. 


  • "You're as pretty as any of them. Just need a nose job." -Kramer