“The Secretary” is the ninth episode of the sixth season of Seinfeld, and the 95th overall. This episode first aired on December 8, 1994. It was written by Carol Leifer and Marjorie Gross and was directed by Andy Ackerman.
Jerry is taking his mother's fur coat and his jacket to dry cleaning. George is going to hire a secretary; he says he'll pass over attractive women so he can concentrate on his work. He hires Ada (Vicki Lewis), a very efficient secretary.
Kramer is in need of moisturizer with ultraviolet light absorber. Elaine bought a dress on sale at Barney's because it looked great on their mirrors, but now it looks awful. She thinks they are using "skinny mirrors" which make people look thinner. She wants to return the dress.
Jerry, Elaine and Kramer go to the movies. Kramer meets Uma Thurman and writes her phone number on Jerry's dry cleaning ticket. Jerry thinks he saw Willie, the dry cleaner, wearing his jacket at the movies. George and his secretary, Ada, feel attracted to each other and have sex at work. During sex, George accidentally screams: "I'm giving you a raise!" When George talks to Jerry about this problem, Jerry suggests George has sex with her again and 'take it back.' At Barney's, Elaine and Kramer return the dress. Kramer has bought the moisturizer he wanted, and Elaine tries on another dress. At the store Kenny Bania (Steve Hytner) is looking for a new suit, and he purchases Kramer's garments for $300. George goes to talk to George Steinbrenner to give Ada the raise he promised. Jerry confronts the dry cleaner about wearing his clothes. Jerry demands his mother's fur coat and the dry cleaner pauses looking to the side implying that it is not there. The dry cleaner asks for the ticket but Kramer has it so Jerry cannot pick up the coat.
Kramer is left in underwear in the women's dressing room. He tells Elaine to ask Jerry for clothes. Elaine goes outside the store looking for an unbiased mirror. Jerry asks Kramer for the ticket; however, it was left in Kramer's trousers which are now in Bania's possession. Kenny Bania wants his money back because the suit he bought from Kramer is stained by the moisturizer. Jerry only cares about the ticket, so he agrees to pay Bania two meals in exchange. However, both the dry cleaning number and Uma Thurman's phone are washed out. Then, Jerry spots Donna, the dry cleaner's wife, wearing his mother's fur coat.
As it turned out Steinbrenner gave Ada a $25,000 raise, which makes Ada's earnings greater than George's. Elaine is forced to buy the dress because she wore it outside the store. Kramer wears Jerry's mother's fur coat.
Again having dinner at Mendy's with Jerry, Bania orders a soup. Bania wrote the telephone number from the ticket before it was washed out; he got a date with this "Uma," and he hopes she is good looking.
Notes About Nothing
- This is the only episode of the series in which the Major League Baseball strike is mentioned. The strike, which began in August 1994, lasted nearly the entire sixth season of Seinfeld.
|Season Six Episodes|
|The Chaperone | The Big Salad | The Pledge Drive | The Chinese Woman | The Couch | The Gymnast | The Soup | The Mom and Pop Store | The Secretary | The Race | The Switch | The Label Maker | The Scofflaw | The Highlights of 100, Part 1 | The Highlights of 100, Part 2 | The Beard | The Kiss Hello | The Doorman | The Jimmy | The Doodle | The Fusilli Jerry | The Diplomat's Club | The Face Painter | The Understudy|